The joys of Army charter travel

What a nightmare. I’m fully convinced that the Army spends a significant amount of time inventing ways to waste time. Travel from Ft. Benning to Iraq is a good case in point.

Friday (19 Sep) started at the god-awful hour of 0500. Someone in their right-thinking mind decided that all 250+ folks at CRC should turn in their linens between 0500-0600. Thankfully cooler heads prevailed and we had about 2 hours. Baggage call was at 0715 which involved everyone humping all of their gear to the pavilion and dropping it on the floor. A good thirty minutes later after we sat around with our thumbs up our asses we had to break the big pile up into smaller piles based on our number on the flight manifest (mine was 106, not that it really matters). Small piles created. Success! More waiting around. In blocks of 50 we then moved our gear into lines to be checked by the military working dogs. We, likewise, had to ensure that our carry on baggage would fit in the size measuring device. This was a box created to “FAA carry on size standards” which our bags had to fit into otherwise much pain was promised. I dunno what left-nut airline has overhead bins as small as this little box but it was amusing to see the voodoo that people would employ to cram their bag into this small little box. At the end of CRC that, sadly, is what passed for humor.

At noon we boarded the dreaded buses for Freedom Hall – the air terminal at Ft. Benning. I’ll spare you the details but suffice to say we arrived around 1230 and departed at 2000. During the time I used the internet, slept, and read a book. Almost the entire book… After all of the pre-departure lectures etc we crossed the tarmac to the plane. As we were leaving the pre-boarding area they had the entire CRC cadre plus the Ft. Benning vice garrison commander (O-6) lined up to shake each of our hands and wish us good luck and safety. I was rather surprised by that but it was a good end to CRC.

Our charter airline, Omni Air International, had a DC-10 for us. I figured… “hey, nice big plane there will be plenty of room.” Wrong. It was all single class (coach) and I was stuck in the middle seat in a middle row in the back of the plane. Not only were the seats the smallest seats I’d every sat in (seriously…I’m not a big dude but my legs were touching both seat arms) but the outside rows (3-4-3 configuration) did not have anyone sitting in the middle seat…on the entire plane. *grumble*

First leg was 7-8 hours from Ft. Benning to Shannon, Ireland. I think that it was about 8 hours but I’m not sure as I slept for about 5.5 of them. We were greeted with the news that we’d have a 5 hour layover in Shannon but that General Order #1 applied…in other words no booze. Not surprisingly, in the terminal (at 830-0900) there were tons of tourists drinking beer. All of the Americans were drinking Guinness and all of the Irish were drinking Budweiser. I wish I’d taken a picture…it was rather bizarre. Atypically, it was sunny and gorgeous that morning. Most folks rotated between sleeping on the floor and visiting the smoking area which was outside in the sun. The Irish, clearly not concerned about terrorists, even stamped my passport when I asked even though I was just a transit passenger. Visa too.

Back on the sardine can to Kuwait City. About 7 hours I think…dunno. I slept for about 5.5 again.